The Pain of Unforgiveness

The Pain of Unforgiveness

My parents divorced when I was 10 years old. I stayed with my mother for a year before moving to live with my grandparents. Life was so unbearable for me. That’s when I know the essence of parents in the life of a child.

My father left for an unknown destination while my mother doesn’t care to know how I was surviving. I kept struggling with my life while my parents were somewhere else living theirs.

I hated my parents so much for what they did to me. I couldn’t let go of it. I thought within myself that maybe because they are poor, that’s why they divorce. I made a promise to myself that I must take revenge on my life by being rich. But the agony and madness of me not going to forgive my parents is still there.

January 2018, I lost my mother. Three days to her death, she asked me for forgiveness. But because I was still angry with her, I couldn’t forgive her till she died. This compounded my agony. I kept asking and blaming myself why I didn’t forgive her. Now I feel tormented.

Unforgiveness is a poison to the soul. These days, it is very rampant. The grudges many people abhor is eccentric. We live in a world where siblings are keeping malice with each other. This is why we have many broken homes.

Though there are some situations that are very difficult to let go, it makes no sense to hold on to what doesn’t add value to your life.

Power of forgiveness.

Everyone has a story to tell. People will definitely offend you in so many ways but it’s not enough to hold on to it. The more you hold on to it, the more you remain bitter.

Although forgiveness is a choice, it is freedom. We are created in such a way that anytime we abhor someone in mind, we are tormented.

But forgiveness is an active process in which you make a conscious decision to let go of negative feelings whether the person deserves it or not.

As you release the anger, resentment, and hostility, you begin to feel empathy, compassion and sometimes even affection for the person who has wronged you.

Studies show that some people are just naturally forgiving. Consequently, they tend to be more satisfied with their lives and have less depression, anxiety, stress, anger, and hostility. But people who hang on to grudges are more likely to experience severe depression and post-traumatic stress disorder, as well as other health conditions.

According to a survey by the Nonprofit Fetzer Institute – ”62 percent of American adults say they need more forgiveness in their personal lives.”

I have no idea of what you are going through, let go if it brings nothing but bitterness. It’s for your own good. Life is a gift.

Live it.

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